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"You wanted Pippin, you got him. Very picky when it comes to Hobbits, you're a rabid fangirl obsessed with this mischievious little man. And who are you to resist the sex appeal of a "hot, clumbsy midget" when the whole Fellowship's already had a piece? This Scottish hunk will last only a few more years before he's reduced to a blubbering shadow of himself, curled into a miserable fetal position after all the rabid fangirl molesting he'll have to go through. Get your gropes in while you have the chance!"
Hey, Pippin'll last!
Mmm..I wonder what he smells like..
heh!
Don't mind me, going to acting soon.
Gonna give out my Valentines..
Not to Pippin, sadly, but I'm working on my kidnapping plan.
Shhhh!